Incredibly well written. As an animator I was particularly pleased by the section that covered the time investment involved in detailed animation. Good work!
Thank you! Yeah, animation is a big pain, I have a lot of respect for people who sit down and do it, and do it really well too.
It seemed like there was a lot of tweening in the 1st half. The effects in the second half, however, were pretty cool. I particularly liked the reconstructive animation.
There will be less when I get more time. Although there wasn't THAT much to begin with. The only tweening is in the lame effects (that will be overhauled) and the planet chamber. The zoom is all manipulated fbf, save for the initial planet.
Thanks for the review.
Room for Improvement
I'm going to split this review up into different parts for the sake of organization.
Character: The character model was simple, but it worked for the animation. I like how the model stood out against the background by using the pink dress as a contrast to the gray scale surroundings. However the clothes and accessories were the only part that stood out. Perhaps a lighter hair color, or maybe adding a little color to the skin, just so the character stands out more.
Background: I really liked the background art. There is a very distinct feel and a very distinct style. The background was well detailed and nicely put together.
Animation: The walk cycle was ok, but there really wasn't much actual animating. The bow blowing in the wind could have been much better animated. The bow seemed to soar rather than twirl which it would do in the wind considering it is a bow not an airplane. Be creative with the path of flight rather than just making it fly in a straight path.
Sound: The foot steps were synced well, but overall the sound was very bland. The ambiance was a little overpowering, and there was little else, if anything, added to the sound track.
Overall: I didn't really understand what the message or point was of the animation. There doesn't always need to be a point but if there isn't the animation should be eccentric, colorful, and captivating.
Thank you for your review, KidneyThief
I will consider the sugestions for the next one.
The Bunny Kill series was one of my 1st interests in Newgrounds, I can honestly say that this submission made my day. I wasn't expecting it at all. Seamless animation, detailed artwork, and superb character design. The smoke popping sound effect was a little overused but otherwise suitable.
I'm positive you have played Ninja Gaiden, I noticed some resemblance of the game play during the fight scenes (Which could have been coincidence.) but the final scene with Ruby's grave was exactly like the end cut scene from Ninja Gaiden.
Excellent soundtrack too, I look forward to your future submissions!
I'm a HUGE fan of the ninja gaiden games!! My original plan was to finish the last battle with a massive sky-high through-the-roof izuna drop, but since the filesize started to grow a bit too large, i had scrap it. I also drew a Dabilahro sword cleverly named "bunnylahro" but unfortunately it never got into the movie.
This animation really captures the innocence of childhood. The artwork is pretty good, maybe use a smaller brush to make it a bit more detailed. The animating itself was simple, but flashy animation isn't always necessary. The story was simple, but touching and not at all boring. Good job!
yes, i just used old sprites of characters. next time i'll re-draw them.
The animation itself was mediocre and microsoft voices never fail to annoy me but the content itself was rather amusing. Adding voice acting and more actual animation would make this submission much better.
Glad you liked it! Essentially, with Lawl, I aim for humor rather than animation skills, etc. And trust me, if I changed the voices or animation style, Lawlolawl fans would not be happy, haha.
Sound. I cannot emphasize enough on sound.
I know lol
It was ok, props for clay animation. You need way more frames, smooth out your animation. More camera angles maybe?
Have you ever truied to make a minute long claymation, not only is it hard to get alot of camera angles in a claymation already, it's hard to fit alot in one minute.
Just some thoughts
Add more detail to your animating. Not the artwork but the actual animating, you need more frames. When the character is walking if you do not want to animate the legs at least animate the arms. A simple back and forth motion will do, you can even tween that. Also review your work before you submit and make sure the dimensions are correct, you don't want your work to by cut off by white void! Haha. My suggestion to you would to be to use movie clips more often. You could use them to give the fire on Ghost Rider's head life for example. Good luck on your future submissions!
thank you for the helpful freview. i really appreciate it
Excellent job, very good animation and character design. Definitely one of the best storylines I have seen in awhile. My two points of criticism would be on the end of the story and on your walk cycles. The walk cycles from behind seem a bit unrealistic, it is not that the character is a shadow but rather that there is no movement in the legs. Perhaps even just moving the character up and down a bit would be enough to give the appearence of a foward walk cycle. As far as the story, I think the scene where there is an error in the computer system a "A few hours earlier" subtitle or somthing along those lines would be nice to help clarify what exactly happened. Overall excellent animation! Keep up the good work!
Yep, I've noticed that as well.
Thanks for watching! :D
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